"Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here, but..."

Have you ever walked into a McDonald’s and ordered a hamburger off of the dollar menu, then asked for a Big Mac instead – for the same price? 

 

Or Gone to KFC and asked whether the chicken was organic and free range?

 Obviously the answer is no.  When you go to a fast food franchise, you kind know what you are getting.  You get what you pay for.

 So why is it that audience members feel entitled for the best seats in the house when they’ve purchased the lowest priced seats?

So tonight, a couple are sitting in the second row of the mezzanine, in our “premiere” section. 

They are sitting dead center.  They ask about getting seats in the orchestra instead.  Only because we had a smaller than anticipated house tonight I decided to move them.  When I presented row H 106-108, the woman actually started quizzing me about the seats.  “How far back is it?  Is it center” She actually asked me where she should sit.  It took a lot of self control to tell “Why don’t you take a look at where they are” and walk away.

 

Why do people feel that bad behavior should be rewarded?  Didn’t we learn these lessons as children? 

I actually don’t get too upset when people ask for better seats.  The issues are always with how people ask.  If the theater empty 30 minutes before show time, you should never lead with “Since there’s no one here, can I get a better seat?”  That will get you a one-way ticket to GET THE HELL OUT OF MY FACE LAND by any House Manager.  Or, if you ask and the house manager says there’s nothing available, it’s not a secret code to ask again.  NO MEANS NO DAMNIT.  Just because you asked me twice does not mean I’m giving my emergencies seats to you! 

 

If I say check-in with me at 5 minutes to curtain, that is not an invitation to chit chat with for the next 10 minutes.  You will not endear yourself to me in that time.  More than likely you’ll make me dislike you – a lot – and you will be watching the show from the TV in the lower lounge.

And finally – if you’re sitting upstairs and ask for a seat in the orchestra and all I offer you is row Q, that is not the opening line to a negotiating session.  “I am not Wayne Brady and this is not Let’s Make A Deal” (Yes – I actually have said this to an audience member before!)

"...of course, that's just my opinion. I could be wrong."

 

PS - Before I could hit "Post This Blog" intermission hit and this lovely display of human kindness happened:

A woman came to complain to me about the "human Petri dish of disease" who had the gall to sit next to her after intermission. This woman made such a scene it was ridiculous. Her friend was mortified.

 

The details: a woman with a severe allergy with her husband and friend take their assigned seats during intermission for Act 2 (why they weren't there for act 1 is a mystery, but irrelevant). One of the 2 women sitting next to them flips out, claiming she is diseased and that she has o right to come into a theater in that condition and risk the health of everyone else. If I wasn't there I think the husband would have slapped the stupid out of her. First she demanded they show their tickets, thinking they didn't belong there. After they showed their tickets, she still tried to convince me to move them which I wasn't going to do (refer to above - rewarding bad behavior). I finally told her to be quiet as she was disrupting the entire theater and preventing act 2 from starting. I put her in 2 empty seats and started the show

"Oy vey -- this one"

Exactly Faye!